It Felt Like Forever

I really wanted to get out of that drastically horrible dream. But it felt like I was trapped in a cage with lost keys. There was no way out and I had to witness the most dreadful scenario of my life.

My mother was being buried in front of my very own eyes and I was helpless as an infant. I knew it was too late. Too late to make any amendments or rectify any mistakes that I had been making for such a long time. I had been the worse son any mother could ever have in her life. The mother who had sacrificed her whole life in nurturing me, I had mocked her away because I was busy building my career. The mother who always knew what I wanted, I had become deaf to her needs at a time when she utterly needed my support. Oh, there was so much I could have done to make her life easier and happier after she had lost my father. But it’s a shame that I found better things to do then spending time with my mother. I wish there was a way to go back in time and make it all right. Oh, how I wish I could go walk back to the day I separated my home just so that I can live a life according to my own rules without any interference from my mother. To live a life where no one tells me what to do and what not to do. To live a life where I could do what I felt right without having anyone to tell me that I am wrong. And today at last Allah had answered my prayer because today my mother has finally said her farewell to me. Now no more phone calls and texts telling me when will I next meet her, asking that if my health is good or have I eaten my food, or telling me to wear warm clothing when the weather becomes cold. Now no more distractions during important meetings when she used to bother me smiley text messages just so that she could get back some attention from my end. Now no more annoying and embarrassing moments in front of friends and colleagues when she used to give me surprise visits at my office. I have got it all I wanted. I should be happy and dancing around with joy.

But I was shaking with fear, regret and embarrassment. I was fearing the loneliness in my life now, and felt sorry about being such a bad son to my mother. I was also embarrassed because I had realized it all too late. I was shaking and shaking so hard that it seemed like there was an earthquake around me. Then suddenly my eyes flew open and a lady dressed in white was hovering over me. For an instant I assumed her to be an angel. But why would an angel come to a person like me. And then slowly the reality started coming to me in bits and pieces. I was at the hospital, sitting in the lounge for the past three hours and the lady in white was standing next to me waiting for me to get hold of myself. She was the surgeon I had seen three hours ago entering my mother’s operation theatre. Oh, my mother, how must she be now. Did she made it till the end of the surgery or was my dream a reality.

I quickly stood up and rushed towards the operation theatre. I could hear the doctor calling from behind trying to catch up with my speed. As I reached the operation theatre I looked at the still closed door and the unlit red bulb on top. I wondered all sorts of possibilities that could have happened.

The doctor finally caught up, huffing and panting. I looked at her with questioning eyes. She smiled and said,

“Congratulations! The surgery was successful.”

I sighed in relief and promised myself to never ignore my mother ever again.

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