Miscelleneous

How I Make My Adult Colouring Time Beneficial?

Before adult colouring books were introduced I used to colour with my nieces and nephew in their colouring books. But having to colour within large areas wasn’t quite satisfying. As adults we like having smaller areas to focus on at a time.

After getting my hands on an adult colouring book I was elated. But simply spending time colouring inside the intricate patterns made me feel guilty. I felt like I was wasting my time just filling patterns with colours rather than doing something productive. That was when I came up with a strategy to make my time spent in colouring blissful. I started doing zikr Allah while colouring. So an hour spent in colouring was now spent as an Ibad’ah.

I started assigning various patterns to different Quranic du’as. For instance, in the picture below I assigned a du’a to the tree trunks, leaves, to the mushrooms and to the weeds.

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Apart from that you can even listen to Quranic recitations while colouring.

All in all, I find this method beneficial for myself and it is one of my de-stressing tools. If you find this method beneficial do try it and let me know what you think.

Jazakillah khairun kaseerun

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Miscelleneous

Increase Focus in Your Salah with These Few Simple Tips

With so much to do during the day we sometimes end up rushing through our salah. Rather than giving the utmost importance to salah in our journey towards Jannah, with give preference to the worldly activities. This in turn impacts our mind and makes us distracted during salah which we later regret about.

These few simple tips will help you develop focus in your salah.

Mentally prepare yourself a few minutes before the time of Adhaan. Keep track of the changes in the Adhaan timings for the five daily prayers. If you live in a western country where you don’t get to hear the sound of Adhaan then you can install an Adhaan app (recommended: Muslim Pro app) on your smart phone.

Don’t delay in offering salah. Delays can lead to laziness and when you will offer salah lazily, you will definitely get distracted.

Mindfully perform ablution. When performing ablution don’t get lost in thoughts or don’t day dream. Instead think about what you are going to do after getting done with your ablution.

Make niyyah for salah. Silently say it in your mind which salah (Fajr, Zuhr, Asr, Maghrib, Isha) you are performing.

Focus on what you are reciting. When praying, focus on the words of the surah or du’a you are reciting instead of mindlessly reciting whatever you have learnt. Through this way you will not get distracted because since you will be concentrating on the words your mid will not have any space to think of anything else.

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Learn new surahs from time to time. Reciting the same surahs over and over again will make you well versed and so you won’t make efforts to focus on the words. This is why from time to time learn a new surah so that you will be careful about reciting it and there will be no room for distractions.

Learn the translation of the surahs and du’a you recite during your salah. When you will know what you are exactly saying in your salah, when you will be able to understand the meaning of the surahs and duas that you are reciting during your salah, you won’t lose focus.

Make du’a for being able to concentrate in salah and also make tawbah for anytime you get distracted. Du’a is a powerful tool of a believer. If you are facing difficulty in concentrating during your salah ask for Allah’s help. Also, at any time you find yourself distracted in prayer, ask for Allah’s forgiveness after finishing with your prayer because He is the most forgiving to His servants.

I pray that we all find peace in our ibad’ah. Ameen.

Jazakillah khairun kaseerun

Miscelleneous

10 Ways To Build Your Self-esteem

Last week I had published a blog post on 10 Signs To Know If You Are Suffering From Low Self-esteem. If those points applied to you then this blog post will help you build your self-esteem. Even if you are not suffering from low self-esteem it is essential that you look after yourself by doing these activities.

  • Start with giving attention to yourself. Instead of making your needs secondary or totally forgetting about your likes and dislikes, make yourself the focus. Remember that no one can take care of you better than yourself. Others treat you the way they see you treating yourself. If you are going to put your needs after other people they too will do the same with you.
  • Take some time out to look after your physical appearance. Take proper long showers, most of the people who treat themselves as unworthy, simply rush with their shower ritual just so they can serve others. Get yourself some nice scented shower gel and shampoo. Select your outfit for each day and match them with accessories. Men can take time in ironing their clothes and polishing their shoes.
  • Find the purpose of your life. We all have a purpose to live, we all have dreams to attain. Was there anything you wanted to accomplish in your life? Think about it. Better discuss it with a loved one. There is still time to achieve your dreams.
  • Do some creative work. Once every week do some creative work that will turn out therapeutic for you. It can be anything related to your interests. Write a funny poem, record some funny voices, do art work or simply come up with a silly game to have fun.
  • Dedicate some time of your day to do what you like. This will make you feel important and discover your worth.
  • Go back to developing a good bond with your loved ones. If your relationship with your spouse, parents or siblings has been damaged, try to develop that bond again. The support we get from our loved ones play a vital role in building our self-esteem and confidence.
  • Demand your right to get recognition. If you like getting praised for what you do, ask people to comment on your work. Ask people what they like about you. There is nothing wrong in seeking compliments for yourself once every while.
  • Ponder upon your surroundings, the place where you live, your work space. What do you like about the place you live in? What is the best part about the area you live in? What do you enjoy the most about your work? If there is anything you dislike, what can you do to make it right?
  • At least once a day eat what you like. It can be as small as your favourite brand of chips or chocolate.
  • Count and cherish your small successes and only the small successes. This is a reminder for you that you don’t always need to achieve something big to appreciate yourself. Every small step towards success, towards the right path, towards your purpose counts as an achievement.

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I really hope these tips help you build your self-esteem. You can always reach me at aisha2aboo@gmail.com.

 

Miscelleneous

10 Signs to Know If You Are Suffering From Low Self-esteem

So in the past few months I was having discussions with some women at different times with each of them individually and I came across a similar pattern in all of their problems. Each one were suffering through a different problem such as, problems with spouse, anger management issues, difficulty looking after their children, feeling unsatisfied with their lives. And the one underlying cause for those problems was low self-esteem. All these women that shared their experiences were in some way or the other suffering through low self-esteem.

I decided to write this article because I know that there are many people who barely even speak about their problems. So I thought why not help people give a warning signal through these 10 signs that show that they might be suffering from low self-esteem. Also, these signs are not just for women but also for men so this blog post generally applies to everyone.

  • Do you find yourself feeling anxious among people? One of the signs of low self-esteem could be that you feel nervous when you are with a lot of people. You don’t feel like attending parties or going to places where you will have to interact with a lot of people. Also, we are talking about people whom you already know and you have interacted with them in the past and no argument has taken place between you people to make you feel anxious. When asked why you don’t feel like to be among them you just don’t have any explanation.
  • Do you simply follow the crowd? When you have to get there in the public you simply follow everyone else. You don’t want to be identified or want eyes on you. So you try your best to be like other people when stepping out of your home.
  • Are you feeling inadequate all the time? Feelings of inadequacy are something common among people who are suffering from low self-esteem. They constantly feel like they are not doing enough. They feel that they haven’t done justice to their responsibilities and feel emptiness in their life.
  • Do you have difficulty in accepting compliments? Each time someone compliments you, you feel like they are lying. You find difficulty in believing that you are good enough in terms of looks or at certain skills.
  • Do you end up neglecting your rights? Another sign of low self-esteem could be that you treat yourself to be the last in everything or sometimes don’t even consider yourself rightful enough to fulfill your needs. When other people ask for your assistance you agree to them without looking at your ease because their approval means more to you than your peace.
  • Are you constantly having negative thoughts? When someone is suffering from low self-esteem they tend to think negatively. If the husband is late from work they start assuming about another woman in their life. If wife doesn’t answer their call, husbands assume that there is something wrong with them. Whenever they do certain work they feel that it has not being done properly and wants to do them again. When the boss calls to speak to them privately the first thought is always a negative one that maybe they have done something wrong.
  • Do you find yourself confused at all times? You are confused and have a hard time making a decision. You wait for others approval before making up your mind. You can’t singlehandedly decide your life course. Even something as simple as looking from a menu and ordering food makes you look at your loved ones for advice and you repeatedly confirm your decision before finally opting for it.
  • You are afraid of challenges? Taking up something new and challenging is usually avoided. You feel like you won’t be able to do it and even if you agree to do it you find yourself in a lot of distress.
  • Do you expect bad to happen to yourself? You might think of yourself as unworthy and start expecting bad things to happen to yourself. It could be people’s words or your own thoughts that might make you feel that way.
  • Have stopped eating your favourite food? One of the last signs that I would like to state is the disinterest in your favourite food. If you are single and your mother is still cooking you might just eat what is on the plate without thinking much of what you like. If you are a wife or a mother, you might be cooking your family’s favourite meals while skipping cooking for yourself. If anyone even suggests to you, you simply shrug off the idea.

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There can be more signs but these are the basic 10 signs of people who are suffering from low self-esteem. If you find these signs visible in yourself then just don’t stay back. Talk to a loved one, discuss your problems. You can also write to me at aisha2aboo@gmail.com.

Jazakallah khairun kaseerun

Article coming up next week: 10 Ways to Build Your Self-esteem

Miscelleneous

Make the Most of the Last 10 Days of Ramadan While You Are Busy

You may be a housewife, a mother, a father with a fulltime job, a student striving hard to achieve high grades. As a devoted Muslim you would want to make the most of the last 10 days of Ramadan, particularly the Laylatul Qadr nights while also focusing on your daily chores.

I have put together 10 tips that will help you make the most of the last 10 days of Ramadan.

  • Limit social networking and unnecessary cell phone usage. This will save your time which usually gets wasted and you can replace these activities with doing more Ibad’ah, Insha Allah. Read my blog post: Ways to Limit Your Social Networking Usage.
  • Complete your Eid shopping and most of the tasks before the 19th Ramadan. You wouldn’t want to stress yourself on the last 10 days of Ramadan hence it will be a better idea to get most of your work done before that.
  • Get activity stuffs for children. If you have young children that create a lot of nuisance while you are praying then maybe you can get them some new activity stuffs that they enjoy doing. This will keep them engaged thus giving you some peaceful time to do your Ibad’ah.
  • Create an environment for Laylatul Qadr nights. A clean, freshly washed prayer mat, with your room being scented and lit with a dim light may create a beautiful atmosphere for the Laylatul Qadr nights and will give you the motivation to pray. When using a scent make sure that it is one which will keep you refreshed and not put you off to sleep.
  • Do zikr Allah while doing your work. Since you won’t be able to pray at all times you can recite ‘Astaghfirullah,’ or many other Du’as stated in the Qur’an and Hadith. Doing zikr Allah also puts Barakah in your time.
  • Schedule your Ibad’ah routine. Just like you have work schedules, schedule the times when you will be solely praying, reading Quran or making Du’a.
  • Utilize free time to make Du’a. Allah is listening to you at all times. So anytime you find yourself but not able to pray, start making Du’a.
  • Keep yourself hydrated and energized. Staying awake at night and having to work in the morning while fasting can really get you tired. So keep yourself energized by eating lots of dates, fruits, and drinking water during the night hours. Read my blog post at TBN: Mind Tricks to Eat Healthy This Ramadan.
  • Keep a mini Qur’an with you when leaving home. So that anytime you find yourself doing nothing, you can simply read it. Read my article at Muslim Bloggers website: Are You Lagging Behind in Finishing Qur’an This Ramadan?
  • Listen to Qur’an when you cannot read it. Save surahs in your cell phone and play them while driving your car, or while you work in the kitchen or at your office.

These were my 10 tips to making the most of the last 10 days of Ramadan. I’d love to get more tips from my readers. Feel free to comment below.

Do remember me in your prayers and do remember Syria, Palestine, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia, Burma and many other places where the Muslim Ummah is suffering, in your prayers.

Jazakillah khairun kaseerun

Miscelleneous

Ways To Limit Your Social Network Usage

Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, Whatsapp are few of the social networks that we use on a daily basis. Sometimes we find ourselves doing nothing other than endlessly scrolling down the newsfeed of different social networks, checking for new updates and feeling bad about how less interesting our life is when compared to the lives of other people on your friends’ list.

With Ramadan just a few days away I thought why not write an article on social networking since I myself had gone through the phase of social network addiction 2 months back and I really had to take up some immediate steps because too much of anything is never good. Plus, I believe that Allah created us for a better purpose than spending hours on social networks doing nothing.

  • Delete apps

There is this illusion of constant connectivity through the social network apps that we have installed on our smart phones and tabs. The instant notifications bound us to cater to them right at that moment. Instead of using apps on the go, fix a time when you will go online though laptop and respond to those notifications.

This applies even to those people who work online from home. I also work from home and this is my experience that instead of responding to your clients at any time of the day you must fix certain hours of the day during which you will be available to answer your clients. Don’t fear that by not being available all the time you will lose clients. Your clients need to know that you have a life outside of work and you also need to give yourself a break.

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  • Fight the urge

Now there are some apps that you can only use on your smart phones or tabs so obviously you won’t be able to delete them. For such apps you should lessen getting the notifications if there are any such options available. Apart from that, even if you get the notification, fight the urge of checking it instantly. Also, another thing you can do is to keep no sound for the notifications so you don’t get distracted while you are working.

  • Start your day with a purpose

The main reason why we find ourselves hooked to various social networks is because we don’t have a purpose. We simply wake up each day for the sake of it and do our work as usual. Have a purpose for each. Like, ‘Today I will respond to all the pending emails,’ or ‘I am going to finish my work early today so I can read my book.’

  • Engage more with the people around you

Have you ever realized that you are more aware of your Facebook friends’ life than what your mother, father or spouse are going through? It is because we don’t make conscious efforts to strengthen our bond with the family any more. Keep your smartphone aside, look up and speak to the people living in your home. It will make you feel much better because you will be speaking to someone who isn’t there to boost about their life but is rather there to have a real conversation with you.

I really hope these tips benefit you like it did to me. Do share any other tips you have for limiting our time spent on social networks. If you have a problem to discuss, you can reach out to at aisha2aboo@gmail.com.

Miscelleneous

Don’t Fill Your Diary With Negative Memories

Often when we write in our diary it is usually to express our feelings about a negative experience. I have heard people say that it helps them feel better and I agree that it sure does. But what happens when in some point in your life you start reading those entries?

Going back to read old diary entries can leave you depressed if they are mostly sad. This is one reason why I discourage myself to write in my diary when I encounter with a bad situation. Even if I do write something negative I make sure that I end it with a positive note.

This is what you can do to make your diary more inspiring.

Fill your diary with positive experiences

People mostly write in their diary when they are sad and that is how a personal diary turns into a diary full of tragedies. So when you read it at some point all the negative encounters make you think that your life is bad and nothing good has ever happened.

While you write about your bad experiences you should also write in your diary when a good event occurs. This way you will actually get an overall perspective of your life and you won’t feel sad.

Leave some space when writing about a negative event

It’s good to express your feelings and some of us enjoy doing it by writing them. But do one thing. When you are suffering through a bad phase, write about it and leave some space. Once you are out of your bad phase you can go back to that entry and write about your experience, what you learnt during that difficult time, how did you get out of it and anything else that will make you feel that every bad phase has an end. Next time you are going through a bad time you can use this entry to become optimistic about your situation.

I used these two techniques to make my diary a source of inspiration rather than a booklet full of grief. I hope it helps you too.

ARE YOU INTERESTED IN 20 DAYS OF POSITIVE JOURNALLING?

The details will be revealed soon but if you think you will be interested you can drop your email id in the comments section below or email me at aisha2aboo@gmail.com. Also, if you are a blogger or a Vlogger, mention your blog and social network details as well.

Jazakillah khair

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Are You Guilty Of Ruining Relationships With Your Words?

No matter how good we are there will always be certain weaknesses that will let us down. One of these weaknesses can be the use of harsh words that ruins relationships. It can be a wicked tongue that creates distance between loved ones or a constant taunt that draws people away from each other.

As much as you know it isn’t healthy you still have difficulty putting a stop to this habit and end up losing a good bond. Well, I would like to share a few tips which will help you control your impulses whenever you feeling like uttering something that is unacceptable.

  • Talk only what is needed. This will help you avoid blurting anything that will offend the other person. When your conversation is short and on point you are more aware of what you are saying and that will help keep a control on your words.
  • If you are losing your cool then change your position. This will help to divert your attention to something else. If it is a person who is making you angry then you can move away from them or if possible even leave that room.
  • If you are having an urge to speak something bad start reciting Du’as. These days I consider smart phones quite a life saver when it comes to awkward situations. You can quickly indulge yourself in an interesting article or a fun game.
  • Be mindful of Allah because whatever wrong you will say will be recorded and Allah will not like it. You should be conscious that Allah is watching you at all times.

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These are quite simple yet effective tips to help you control the tongue. Start applying them from right now and Insha Allah you will find yourself improving in a short span of time.

 

Miscelleneous

How To Deal With Happiness Hangover?

So in one of my previous blog post I had written about feeling sad after a thrill of excitement. I had defined this feeling as happiness hangover and had promised to write about how you can deal with it.

Before I talk about dealing with happiness hangover I want to explain a little more about why it happens. Yes, it happens after you have felt extremely happy but that is not it. Happiness hangover is a feeling that comes when we feel that this is it. I have got what I wanted. You might be anticipating for your wedding ceremony and once it is over with all its fun filled parties you start feeling low. It can also be getting that promotion which you had been working so hard for and once you get it you feel low after a certain amount of time has passed.

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That low feeling is the exact moment when realization hits, this is it, I have achieved what I wanted to achieve. That’s it! So in order to tackle with happiness hangover you should instead ask yourself ‘What next?’

After attaining that one dream your life doesn’t stops there so why should you stop there. Start planning for your next goal. Ask yourself that what you should do now. If you are finally married you should begin working on becoming a responsible spouse. If you have been promoted you need to gear up and work hard to take over more tasks. The point to deal with happiness hangover is to not become stagnant. Keep moving on.

Also before you start to work on your next goal take a short break to reflect. Become mindful of your new situation and the new demands it expects from you. Make a rough plan that will help you settle in your new role. Lastly, have faith in Allah and don’t forget to thank Him.

Jazakillah khairun kaseerun.

Miscelleneous

Heal Monday Blues With These Tips

Ahh, so here is Monday again. Time to get back to work. To the same old boring routine, and wait for another 5 days so you can sleep again for long hours. Why can’t there be another day in between Sunday and Monday so that we can prepare for Monday. But alas, that isn’t happening so why not check out these few tips to help you heal your Monday blues.

Prepare for your Monday beforehand

Many of you avoid thinking about Monday until the very last minute when it is almost time to sleep. To make your Monday less stressful it is ideal that you are mentally prepared. If there are any important tasks to be done on Monday then stay mentally prepared. Before you sleep make a mental note of all the things you will have to do the next day.

Add a special breakfast to your Monday routine

People plan ahead for making their Sunday mealtimes a fun. But why not add specialty to your Monday breakfasts as well. This will help you wake up more enthusiastically.

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Wear your favourite outfit

Another way you can make your Monday special is by wearing your favourite dress to work. Match it up with certain formal accessories and you will feel good about stepping out of your house.

Just make your Monday special

The reason why we find Monday boring is because it is an indication of the same old routine that we had just gotten rid of two days before. The idea behind healing Monday blues is to add something special to your Monday routine.

Bring some creativity and see yourself feeling good about your Mondays. Do let me know what special are you planning for this Monday.

Jazakillah khairun kaseerun.